An open letter from an Alcoholic.
I haven't spoken a lot recently about my gratitude for my life and how I got here.
In this middle of this month, I will celebrate 20 years of sobriety.
If you know anything about addiction--then you'll know that's quite the achievement. One of the reasons that I began Life, Love & Lettuce was to help women find their way to sobriety.
I blog so much about my garden, because my garden is where I find myself closest to the God of my understanding. It's where I go when the world becomes too much for me. It is my sanctuary and my relationship with plants is one of the massive foundation stones of my recovery.
Another of those massive foundation stones is my recovery journal-a diary and gratitude journal.
It feels like only yesterday that I was struggling to stay sober for a week--I remember those early days and it's only with hindsight I realise how amazing it is for anyone like me to stay sober one day at a time in the early days.
Another large part of my recovery has been helping others. Passing on the message as it was passed on to me.
Like a good alcoholic! when I left my treatment centre all those years ago, I did a complete rebuild on the daily planner and gratitude journal that I kept while I was there.
I've always loved writing and journaling, so it was a no-brainer that I would continue on using the sheets that I'd been given--but I changed them to suit my own life and recovery.
This week, I've put that diary up for sale in electronic format and as a printable on Etsy.
I'm committed to sharing the message of recovery with as many people as I can.
Being clean and sober has changed my life and I want it to change other people's lives as well.
If my story resonates with you, I hope you decide to make an investment in yourself. It's my experience that we don't much use (or value) the things we get 'for free'. There's something that happens when we make a commitment to purchase, we make more of an effort.
I think that's one of the reasons that I so appreciate the sober life--I had to work so damn hard to get here!
Maybe my story doesn't resonate with you--that's okay. Maybe you might like to share about it somewhere. Or perhaps you'll think about the Passion Pulse Planner when someone you know comes to you and says they are having trouble with anxiety, or eating, or breaking bad habits, or just generally getting out of the hole they may have found themselves in.
Helping others to stay sober will always be my life's work.
My sobriety is my greatest gift--the struggle I had getting and staying sober. It's why having a sober life now is so special.
Without sobriety, I have nothing. Everything I put in front of staying sober I will lose, because I will lose my sobriety and without it I have (and am) nothing.
Alcohol and drugs kill people like me--and people like me destroy not only themselves, but everyone around them. When we're deep in addiction we don't understand that--and neither do the people around us.
I'm glad I had the courage to reach out for help all those years ago. Today I have a blessed life, a happy life, a life that is free from the tyranny of alcohol.
I am truly blessed.
Thank you for being here and taking the time to read my short story. People like me need other people like me to keep us sane and sober in the madness of the world.
I will not drink with you today.
Love & Lettuce,
Toni xx